


Harry Potter Haikus- Part 1

by YertzNilo357



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2018-10-31
Packaged: 2019-08-11 09:37:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16473074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YertzNilo357/pseuds/YertzNilo357
Summary: Harry Potter Haikus- Vaguely in character and loosely haikus.





	Harry Potter Haikus- Part 1

_Meow, meow, meow, meow, purr_

_Meowing, growl, grrrrr, Food, looks good,_

_I’m eating Scabbers_

** Crookshanks- On the Hunt for the Dirty Rat **

 

_Oh Merlin, I really_

_Hope that she doesn’t realise,_

_I stole her biscuits_

** Ron- Sweet Tooth Unbidden, Hoping His Sister won’t now Kill Him **

 

_I loved Grindelwald,_

_He was my true everything;_

_Too bad he’s a dick._

** Dumbledore- Ruminating Over a Failed Relationship **

_Dumbledore, you fool,_

_I too will always love you,_

_Though I prefer cake._

** Grindelwald- Nuremberg Cake-fession **

 

_I wish I was young,_

_Full of piss and vinegar,_

_Not disappointment._

** Snape- Regretting a Failed Past, Emoishly **

_Haha, we flipped him,_

_We saw his underpants, ha;_

_Why does she hate me?_

** James- Asking the Real Questions, Ignorant of the True Answer **

 

_Oh god, a centaur;_

_Please God no, leave me alone;_

_Anything but that._

** Umbridge- No Planets Shined for Her **

_OHHHHHH, I wish I had,_

_A bottle of pricey scotch,_

_So I could get sloshed._

** Hagrid- OOC **

 

_My father loves me,_

_He is no heartless monster,_

_And he is alive._

** Malfoy- A Response to Harry **

 

_Get out get outplease_

_Leave me be, please go away,_

_Get out of my HEAD!_

** Quirrell- Before He Was Subsumed **

 

_I am going, yes,_

_To purchase some Christmas socks,_

_I will show Harry._

** Dobby- His Day Off **

 

_The omens portend,_

_Death is travelling quickly,_

_Within Hogwarts’ Walls._

** Trelawney- Very Pickled, Most Likely Correct **

 

_I have my Dungbombs,_

_Fanged Frisbees, inkpots, tables,_

_Just gotta find Filch._

** Peeves- Passing the Time, as per Usual **

 

_Treacle tart, yum, yum,_

_I will put you in my tum_

_I love treacle tart_

** Harry- Enjoying His Moment of Fun **

 

_Was this all desire?_

_Or is this something deeper?_

_I want to find out._

** Goyle- Discovering His Partner Was Always By His Side **

 

_It was not desire,_

_It is something much deeper,_

_I’m yours, forever._

** Crabbe- Finally, His Dream Is Reality **

 

_I’m not a woman,_

_I am a human male, right?_

_Man, this really sucks._

** Blaise- Proclaiming His Masculinity; He Is A Dude **

 

_I know he did it;_

_I know by his shifty eyes,_

_Ron ate my biscuits._

** Ginny- Ron is SO Bat-Bogeyed **

 

_His name is Rio,_

_And he dances on the sand,_

_What a banging tune._

** Seamus’ Dad- “Me Dads a Muggle; Me Mams a Witch” reference **

_I really do hope,_

_That writing those two small lines,_

_Won’t breach copyright._

** Self-Insert- The True Hero of Harry Potter, My Harem includes Everyone **

_Man, football’s awesome,_

_Much better than that Quidditch,_

_What a silly sport._

** Dean- Pining for Some Good British Sport **

 

_Man, I must proclaim,_

_That being stuck in this house,_

_Is truly quite lame._

** Sirius Black- With a Helping of Cabin Fever **

_My word I’m gorgeous._

_So truly, truly, gorgeous._

_Just so damn gorgeous._

** Lockhart(?)- Doesn’t Know His Name, But Remembers His Best Feature **

_Oh wow, oh wowee,_

_Wowee, wowee, wow, wowee,_

_This Haiku is crap._

** Co-Author- The Actual Primary Author; Soz **

 

_Always, I will wait;_

_Always, I will hope and hope;_

_That you felt the same._

** Snape- Pining For His True Obsession **

_You are awe-inspiring;_

_Singularly beautiful;_

_And I hate you so._

** Lupin- Talking To An Old Foe, Thousands of Kilometres Above **

_Oh really Ronald;_

_You can’t always copy my notes;_

_Please, do it yourself._

** Hermione- Ron Is In a Pickle **

_Me now want Hagger;_

_Hagger me make good tasty;_

_Food, am big Hungry._

** Grawp- Haven’t Read Order of The Phoenix for Yonks; Vaguely Recall Grawp’s Linguistics. I imagine this is wrong.  **


End file.
